This week's UK TV & radio

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Listings for Paramount on Saturday, September 21 2019

06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
08:00Friends: The Dates The One With The Thumb A soda company gives Phoebe $7,000 after she finds a dismembered thumb in a can of soda. Meanwhile, Chandler is smoking again, to his friends' dismay. (S1, E03) 
08:35Friends: The Dates The One With The Candy Hearts Ross and his Valentine's Day date end up at the same restaurant as Susan and Carol. Inevitably, things don't go quite to plan. (S1, E14) 
09:00Friends: The Dates The One With Two Parts (2): When Rachel sprains her ankle and has no insurance, she cajoles Monica into trading identities so she can use her coverage. Naughty! (S1, E17) 
09:30Friends: The Dates The One Where Ross Finds Out A drunken Rachel is persuaded to call Ross and reveal her feelings for him on his answering machine. Now, Ross must make a decision between her and Julie. (S2, E07) 
10:00Friends: The Dates The One With Russ While dating a guy named Russ, Rachel can't see his uncanny resemblance to Ross. Meanwhile, Monica gets back together with "fun Bobby". (S2, E10) 
10:30Bad Robots Student Barney ties himself in knots when posting a fragile wedding present, drivers battle with a parking ticket machine, and a automated painting assistant decides to help a decorator. (S1, E01) 
11:00Lemony Snicket's A Series Of... Film ...Unfortunate Events: When a fire kills their parents, three children are delivered to the custody of cousin Count Olaf (Jim Carrey), who is secretly plotting to steal their parents' fortune. (2004) 
13:00Friends: 25 Years The One Where Rachel Has a Baby, Part 1: Ross and Rachel arrive at the hospital. Ross' mum gives Ross her mother's engagement ring to propose to Rachel with. (S8, E23) 
13:30Friends: 25 Years The One Where Rachel Has a Baby, Part 2: After forty-seven hours of labour, Rachel has her baby. However, Joey finds Ross' engagement ring and accidently proposes to a vulnerable Rachel. (S8, E24) 
14:00Friends: 25 Years The One Where No One Proposes Following Joey's accidental proposal to Rachel, he tries to tell her it was an accident but can't find an opportune moment. (S9, E01) 
14:30Friends: 25 Years The One Where Emma Cries When Joey attempts to gain Ross' forgiveness for mistakenly asking Rachel to marry him, they end up in the emergency room. (S9, E02) 
15:00Friends: 25 Years The One With the Pediatrician Phoebe and Joey decide to set each other up on blind dates but Joey forgets, and finds a complete stranger named Mike (Paul Rudd) to be Phoebe's date. (S9, E03) 
15:30Friends: 25 Years The One With the Sharks Monica thinks Chandler is aroused by shark documentaries. Meanwhile, Joey thinks he's already slept with the girl he's dating. (S9, E04) 
16:00How To Train Your Dragon Film A young Viking who aspires to hunt dragons becomes the unlikely friend of a young dragon, and learns there may be more to the creatures than he thought. Jonah Hill and Kristen Wiig feature. (2010) 
17:55Friends: 25 Years The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner Phoebe plans a night out for her birthday, but only her and Joey are on time, as all the other friends have issues which make them late. (S9, E05) 
18:25Friends: 25 Years The One With the Male Nanny Ross and Rachel hire a male nanny (Freddie Prinze Jr.). Chandler feels insecure when Monica tells him that she has met "the funniest man she has ever met". (S9, E06) 
19:00Friends: 25 Years The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song Ross accidentally discovers that singing the suggestive lyrics to "Baby Got Back" is the only way to get baby Emma to sleep. (S9, E07) 
19:30Friends: 25 Years The One With Rachel's Other Sister Rachel's spoiled, irresponsible sister, Amy (Christina Applegate) shows up for Thanksgiving and causes arguments amongst the gang. (S9, E08) 
20:00Michael McIntyre's Big Show This episode there is comedy from Sarah Millican and a member of the public is in for a shock when he keeps bumping into his hero! (S2, E03) 
21:00Jason Manford: Live at the... ...Manchester Apollo. Renowned for his cheeky story-telling and friendly delivery, Jason takes us through the rules of driving, urinal etiquette, and the lies Dads tell in a tour de force of comedy. 
22:00Sausage Party Film A misplaced sausage (Seth Rogen) and his savory friends embark on an existential adventure in a massive supermarket. Kristen Wiig, Jonah Hill, Michael Cera, and James Franco co-star. (2016) 
23:45Airplane II: The Sequel Film A faulty computer causes a passenger space shuttle to head straight for the Sun. Can Ted Striker save the day and get the shuttle back on track - again? Rip Torn and William Shatner feature. (1982) 
01:30Roast Battle Hosted by Jimmy Carr, with judges Jonathan Ross and Katherine Ryan. Featuring Alex Brooker vs. Rosie Jones, and Rose Matafeo Vs Naz Osmanoglu. (S2, E05) 
02:00Roast Battle Hosted by Jimmy Carr, with judges Jonathan Ross and Katherine Ryan. Featuring Tom Ward vs. Darren Harriott, and Tom Allen vs. Larry Dean. (S3, E01) 
02:35The Cleveland Show Brotherly Love Cleveland begins pimping out Terry for bachelorette parties as a "cable guy. (S1, E18) 
03:00The Cleveland Show Brown History Month Cleveland and Lester are ordered by a judge to work together on a float for the Stoolbend Unity Parade after they get in a fight. (S1, E19) 
03:25Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. This week's loser must talk trash...literally! The blind lead the blind, kisses are stolen, and how many pencils can the guys fit into pockets secretly? (S4, E01) 
03:50Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. The guys lose their wives, pitch stupid inventions, and receive hugs of forgiveness. There's sweet revenge involving an angry brother and a human piņata! (S4, E02) 
04:15Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. Some seriously non-advanced 'advanced art classes' are taught by the guys, darts decide pub pranks, and the loser teaches a stressful stress-free seminar. (S4, E03) 
04:35Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. Which one of the fake podiatrists will see defeat? The guys convince strangers to bury strange things in a park, and must stare their way through a store. (S4, E04) 
05:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping.